Easygoing Eyebeast keira Posted June 28, 2011 Share Posted June 28, 2011 Originally Posted By: Karoka Originally Posted By: It's a trap Last but not least, he decided it was a good idea to insert a fry up his nose. He never managed to get it back out... How did he even manage to get it up there? It was one of the small crunchy (read: delicious) fries that you get at the bottom of a McDonald's fry sleeve/cup/thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Alorael at Large Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 Originally Posted By: Karoka I once breathed in a mosquito. A couple minutes later my nose tube(?) felt itchy. Then my nose started bleeding. The next day, there was a black spot on my feces. EDIT: I'm not so sure about that last sentence, though. Your nose does connect to the back of your throat, so any bugs that make it in will probably end up there and not in your airways. But if it's digested, it's going to be digested and no more identifiable than any other food you eat. —Alorael, who isn't sure why he's going into this, except possibly to add one further detail: he has had a fly crawl into his ear. It sounded a lot like having water in it, except the gurgling wouldn't stop and the bug couldn't be shaken out. A few minutes later a (probably disgruntled) fly emerged and fled. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Slariton Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 There was a... septuagenarian eskimo who swallowed a fly... in his ear... I don't know why he swallowed the fly... perhaps he'll DIE. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magnificent Ornk Dikiyoba Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 Originally Posted By: Karoka I once breathed in a mosquito. A couple minutes later my nose tube(?) felt itchy. Then my nose started bleeding. The next day, there was a black spot on my feces. EDIT: I'm not so sure about that last sentence, though. Also, unless it was a deep-fried mosquito, it doesn't count as a crossover. Dikiyoba. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Easygoing Eyebeast Dantius Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 Originally Posted By: CRISIS on INFINITE SLARTIES There was a... septuagenarian eskimo who swallowed a fly... in his ear... I don't know why he swallowed the fly... perhaps he'll DIE. You're a terrible limerick writer. I mean, good god man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Slariton Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 You're a terrible not-a-limerick recognizer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Easygoing Eyebeast Dantius Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 Originally Posted By: CRISIS on INFINITE SLARTIES You're a terrible not-a-limerick recognizer. It certainly looked like a poorly written one: Originally Posted By: Slarty, with some linebreaks added and ellipses removed There was a septuagenarian eskimo Who swallowed a fly in his ear I don't know why He swallowed the fly Perhaps he'll DIE. Looks kinda like one to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Easygoing Eyebeast Dintiradan Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 I'd link to the song, but as it turns out, I can't stand any rendition other than Fred Penner's. Odd. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Slariton Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 Dantius, the ellipses don't line up to your line breaks, and it bears an awfully obvious resemblance to a certain children's song. "I mean, good god man." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Easygoing Eyebeast VCH Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Originally Posted By: Dantius Originally Posted By: CRISIS on INFINITE SLARTIES There was a... septuagenarian eskimo who swallowed a fly... in his ear... I don't know why he swallowed the fly... perhaps he'll DIE. You're a terrible limerick writer. I mean, good god man. Originally Posted By: CRISIS on INFINITE SLARTIES You're a terrible not-a-limerick recognizer. The correct reply here is, "you're a terrible limerick writer." It makes no sense, yet it almost always deals a fatal blow to your opponent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rotghroth Rhapsody RCCCL Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 I really like the Spidweb Boards The mods keep out the Spamming Hordes An occasional slip up With a Spamy hic up Taken down by the mods humorous swords. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magnificent Ornk nikki. Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 That's it. I've just given this thread one star. I hope you're all pleased with yourselves. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rotghroth Rhapsody RCCCL Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 I am, that's one more star than it had before. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Easygoing Eyebeast Dantius Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Originally Posted By: Shelagh That's it. I've just given this thread one star. I hope you're all pleased with yourselves. I have given it five stars to spite you! Now it will require six more one-star ratings before it reaches an average rating of one star again! Muwahahahaha! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Slariton Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Bride of Karma Thread Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Well-Actually War Trall Rowen Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 The only Karma is bad Karma. Especially when you bring it up here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Randomizer Posted June 30, 2011 Author Share Posted June 30, 2011 Now you've done it. You made this into a Karma topic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Easygoing Eyebeast The Mystic Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 So tell me, where in the world is Karma Sandiego? I've been holding onto that one since before the old boards went down. Sorry, I just couldn't resist any longer. Back to (drifted) topic: Rated one star. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Slariton Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Rowen, that line goes perfectly with your current avatar. Mystic... arrgghh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magnificent Ornk nikki. Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 i weep for that which i have wrought Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rotghroth Rhapsody RCCCL Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 This topic has turned into a Karma thread all previous ideas fall to the side dead The limericks will stall Fried foods gone et al Now only about Karma shall things be said. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Easygoing Eyebeast Dantius Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 We can't post here. This is limerick country! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ineffable Wingbolt Erebus the Black Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Rated Originally Posted By: Shelagh That's it. I've just given this thread one star. I hope you're all pleased with yourselves. Second that, one more one star given. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Alorael at Large Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 We need a lesson on limerick meter, I think. —Alorael, who just discovered that LimerickDB is defunct. That's a tragedy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rotghroth Rhapsody RCCCL Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 You rate it more and more Stars But should give up and hit Bars And all get Drunk Fall into a down Funk Just be careful when Driving Cars Click to reveal.. (sorry) Not very good I know, but forgive me, I'm pulling these off the top of my head, give me a couple of hours and I'll hit you with some Epic Limerick Prose! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyshakk Koan Skwish-E Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 At the deep fried Kool-Aid you may jeer. The cholesterol, maybe, you fear. But I know it is true, Even one such as you, Can develop a taste for fried beer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magnificent Ornk nikki. Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 this THREAD with | it's LIM'ricks | so AW-ful, makes NONE but | the STU-pid | noobs CHORT-le, a-LOR-a- | el DID try but MIS-takes | still FLEW by now NIK-ki | must GIVE you |this TWAD-dle. lim'ricks SUCH | as these I | have writ-EN, may not FIT | the top-IC | that's giv-EN, but the MET- | er is RIGHT (all mist-TAKES | are but SLIGHT) one star RAT- | ings, oh LOOK | a kit-TEN! From Wiki: Click to reveal.. The standard form of a limerick is a stanza of five lines, with the first, second and fifth usually rhyming with one another and having three feet of three syllables each; and the shorter third and fourth lines also rhyming with each other, but having only two feet of three syllables. The defining "foot" of a limerick's meter is usually the anapaest, (ta-ta-TUM), but limericks can also be considered amphibrachic (ta-TUM-ta). (Edit: And, I know both of those limericks can be amphibrachic AND anapaestic, but I figured I'd show you the two.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ineffable Wingbolt Erebus the Black Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Hey! Did they removed the rating option or does it disappear after one rates? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rotghroth Rhapsody RCCCL Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 I admit mine were horrid at best They were done in a minute or less Give me a second chance This one works at a glance Consider this the five minute test Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Slariton Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Nikki, your limerick form is great, but some of the words you used just aren't stressed the way you wrote them in. MIS-takes? top-IC? writ-EN? giv-EN? No way. And you're really forcing it putting the stress on the third syllables rather than the second syllables in the second limerick. It doesn't scan, sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magnificent Ornk nikki. Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Heh, I know. I suppose as a reference aid it may have helped to make them absolutely correct, but I thought they worked well enough as they are considering. Just for you, though: When Slarty, the prince of these fora says verse is as bad as Gomorrah, there are things you can do like a subtle eff you: lim'ricks where the stress points are clearer. Click to reveal.. when SLAR-ty, | the PRINCE of | these FOR-a, says VERSE is | as BAD as | go-MOR-rah, there ARE things | you CAN do like A sub | tle EFF you: lim-RICK's where | the STRESS points | are CLEAR-er. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyshakk Koan Karoka Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Fora and Gommorrah don't rhyme with clearer! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Easygoing Eyebeast Dintiradan Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 That limerick only rhymes if you pronounce 'clearer' as 'clearah'. And only crazy Brits do that. EDIT: Sniped. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Alorael at Large Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Which is fine, except it would have to be CLOR-uh. —Alorael, who admits that he doesn't know any accents like that. On the other hand, it's a limerick. The proper response to pedantic complaints is probably throwing a punch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magnificent Ornk Student of Trinity Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 This limerick tries to rhyme "orange", Of poets and rhymers the scournge. Well, so far so good; One couplet I've doed. I think I might make it, by Geornge! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Slariton Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 There once was a member named Nikki Who seemed to think Slarty was picky. Said Slart, "It's a duel! I know you're no fool, But truly is stress something tricky." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Easygoing Eyebeast Trenton. Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 A jolly good fisher named Fisher was fishing about in a Fissure (spelling?) a fish with a grin pulled the fisherman in now they're fishing the fissure for Fisher! I sat with the dutches (s?) at tea as distressed as a person could be her rumblings abominal were simply phenomonal (i seriously cant spell) and everyone thought it was me! I have a funny rhyme to "Twas the night before christmas" but I wont tell it unless asked as not to change the subject. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Easygoing Eyebeast Dintiradan Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 There once was a man from Nantucket ... ... Not worth the ban, fuggeddaboutit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ineffable Wingbolt Erebus the Black Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Anything can work under a literary license. Here is a well known limerick: Originally Posted By: Princeton Tiger There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his gold in a bucket. But his daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man And as for the bucket Click to reveal.. NANTUCKET Click to reveal.. (Nan took it) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magnificent Ornk nikki. Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Cried Nikki, "you're more than a fair match but this Brit has dreamt up a new batch, it's the end of the line for those terrible rhymes Though, still you are somewhat of a catch." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Alorael at Large Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 Now Slarty cries out for a duel To seek out his vengeance most cruel But if we have to wait 'Til he deigns to update —Alorael, who will finish this limerick in a couple of days. Definitely before the end of the week. Honest! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Slariton Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 The new wine that you pour You must pour in new skin — Not in metrical bore. The new wine that you pour Must speak, then say no more. Let meaning pile in The new wine that you pour. You must pour in new skin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magnificent Ornk Student of Trinity Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 Meter is a funny thing. Some people seem to have a natural ear for it, a few people never seem to quite get it. It makes a surprising difference even in prose. If you do it right, the words just naturally fit the pattern. If you do it really right, they sometimes don't quite — you should never require an outright wrong emphasis, but if you occasionally need to emphasize a word that you normally wouldn't, it makes the pattern less mechanical. Then beyond the simple pattern of syllable emphasis, there is the more general pattern of pronunciation. The stock illustration is this chunk from the Essay on Criticism, especially the last four lines: Originally Posted By: Alexander Pope True ease in writing comes from art, not chance, As those move easiest who have learned to dance. 'Tis not enough no harshness gives offense; The sound must seem an echo to the sense. Soft is the strain when zephyr gently blows, And the smooth stream in smoother numbers flows; But when loud surges lash the sounding shore, The hoarse rough verse should like the torrent roar. When Ajax strives some rock's vast weight to throw, The line too labours, and the words move slow: Not so when swift Camilla scours the plain, Flies o'er th' unbending corn, and skims along the main. It's amazing how slow and laboring the two lines about Ajax are to say, though perfectly correct and not at all awkward; and in contrast how smoothly and easily the lines about Camilla roll off the tongue. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ineffable Wingbolt Erebus the Black Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 This is from my dad, he has copyrights: Cold, Happy, Not Life goes by wether you want it or not You just get older till you sit on a pot Pick up the shovel and go to the mine If you dig and you dig who knows what you'll find Don't make up your mind, It's not very kind It's a swamp where everythig goes plomp good intentions drown in that oozing stinky brown you end up thinking I'm a useless pitless clown Pull out your finger , pull up your pants don't nearly impress you they don't make you dance What you need is a buldozer pushing at your back A blindfold on your eyes , no escape through a crack. get help from the "organization" Learn who you are Then you can fly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyshakk Koan Skwish-E Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 I can't take much more of this rhyming The meter, the wordplay, the timing But then how would it be, If I hooked up a Wii, And all that I posted was miming! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyshakk Koan Skwish-E Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 ... (walks into the wind) ... (in a glass box) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seasoned Roamer Xazo-Tak Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 Sorry for complaining at the mods, but isn't this in the wrong section? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Understated Ur-Drakon Sudanna Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 What section should it be in? Also, why are you posting in a topic that's been dead for a week? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Easygoing Eyebeast Dantius Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 Originally Posted By: People What section should it be in? Also, why are you posting in a topic that's been dead for a week? It's hardly "dead" if it's still on the first page of the forum in question. Which it was. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Understated Ur-Drakon Sudanna Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 It was last posted in a week ago. It has been dead for a week. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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