How to get a thesis out of the US?

[VCH]

Does any one know how I can get an american Ph.D, masters, or honours thesis from a US university? My university doesn't have access to most american digital copies, and they of course wont send the hard copy. If someone was willing to access the two these I am looking for and send them to me through email, if possible, I would appreciate it.

 

1. STANFORD UNIVERSITY, Stanford, California Honors thesis.

 

Thesis title: An investigation of abnormalities in amphibian communities : evidence for parasite infection as a cause of supernumerary limbs and other limb deformities in Hyla regilla

 

Author: PIETER JOHNSON

 

Advisors: Dr. Paul R. Ehrlich and Dr. Peter M. Vitousek.

---------------------------------------------------

 

2. UNIVERSITY OF WISCONSIN, Madison, Wisconsin Ph.D. thesis.

 

Author: PIETER JOHNSON

 

Dissertation title: “Causes and consequences of disease in aquatic ecosystems”

 

Advisor: Dr. Stephen R. Carpenter.

 

Thanks

 

BTW: I realise I could ask the guy for a copy by email, but I haven't had the best of luck with that in the past, so I'm going to try this first.

[Triumph]

You've got a PM! I found the dissertation, but the not the thesis...

[cfgauss]

Have you tried contacting the libraries of those universities? They should be able to make copies and send them to you somehow? Even if they make you do something stupid like pay for them.

 

Alternatively, you could try contacting people in the departments there who can do that? It shouldn't be too hard to find some random professor or grad student there who's willing to do that.

[Cthulhu]

Random information on this guy: http://salvemossapos.com/PDFs/Johnson-Pieter-CV.pdf

(snip)

 

Theres his Phone #, you might wanna try that.

I'll email this person and pose as a needy student that requires those two works to assist in the creation of an important essay for my fictional senior year, or something like that.

[Dantius]

Originally Posted By: Cthulhu

Theres his Phone #, you might wanna try that.
I'll email this person and pose as a needy student that requires those two works to assist in the creation of an important essay for my fictional senior year, or something like that.

That might be a very bad idea. I'd recommend that you let VCH call.

[Cthulhu]

Could it? I don't see how sending an innocent email behind SEVEN PROXIES(had to do it) could backfire.

[Lilith]

what

 

why would you think that was a good idea

 

if they get two different emails within a week about the same obscure thesis, one of them coming from behind a series of suspicious proxies, they're going to think some kind of stalker ex-girlfriend is after the guy who wrote the thesis or something

[Cthulhu]

I never claimed it was a good idea, I merely inquired as how it could potentially turn out to be a very bad idea.

[Niemand]

It is, in fact, strictly forbidden under ITAR policies to export graduate level material on amphibians from the United States. Attempting to contact amphibian researchers directly will likely prompt the CIA to investigate you.

[Cthulhu]

/whistles

Good thing I was planning on holding off on it until tomorrow.

 

Thanks, Niemand!

[Student of Trinity]

The reason amphibian research is so sensitive is that the US Navy has a critical strategic role for frogmen.

[Cthulhu]

Maybe in the future we'll see literal Navy SEALS.

[cfgauss]

Then we Truly will be the Greatest country on Earth.

[VCH]

I have contacted libraries in Canada and the US. They just wont play nice. Theses or thesises (whatever) are well guarded and cannot officially cross the boarder.

 

Oh and Cthulhu don't bother contacting him, I'll do that myself if need be. My masters supervisor actively corresponds with the guy any way. I just wanted to see if I could get it more easily, and sometime this year, as old faculty members tend to be very forgetful.

[Enraged Slith]

I wouldn't be surprised, considering the US Navy already uses trained sea animals for various tasks.

[Ephesos]

Um... okay. Posting some random dude's phone number on the public interwebs is not good etiquette. Please don't do that.

[Cthulhu]

In retrospect, a PM with the number would have been the correct move...

[The Mystic]

Originally Posted By: Niemand

Attempting to contact amphibian researchers directly will likely prompt the CIA to investigate you.

Yeah, well, that's kid of expected; researchers in general tend to be very antisocial, especially when they're really amphibians.

[cfgauss]

That's racist! Err, specist, whatever.

[Student of Trinity]

"Antisocial" is a heinous slur against the researcher species, and you'll be hearing from my lawyer as soon as I can bring myself to actually talk to him. Yech.

[The Mystic]

Originally Posted By: cfgauss

That's racist! Err, specist, whatever.

Originally Posted By: Student of Trinity

"Antisocial" is a heinous slur against the researcher species, and you'll be hearing from my lawyer as soon as I can bring myself to actually talk to him. Yech.

Sorry; I guess it comes from watching way too many science fiction movies.

[VCH]

I now have the second request, but I'm still looking for the first one. It's actually an undergraduate honours thesis. If anyone goes to Stanford, please let me now if you can help. I found the physical copy by the Stanford library database. The corrected title is below.

 

STANFORD UNIVERSITY, Stanford, California Honors thesis.

 

Thesis title:

 

An investigation of abnormalities in amphibian communities : evidence for parasite infection as a cause of supernumerary limbs and other limb deformities in Hyla regilla

 

Author: PIETER JOHNSON

[Monroe]

[Cthulhu]

Zomg scary

[The Mystic]

Originally Posted By: Cthulhu

Zomg scary

I second the motion.

I was just about to have dinner when I saw that. Waiter? Check, please.

[Cthulhu]

It almost looks like a person is smiling in the background while squeezing the poor mutant frog.

 

Scratch that, the person IS smiling.

[Dintiradan]

Spiderfrog, Spiderfrog, does whatever a spider and/or frog can...

[Goldengirl]

Giant Intelligent Friendly Talking Spiderfrogs haunt my dreams at night with their high pitched ribbets.

[Unbound Draykon]

you know i think Jeff should put Spiderfrogs in the new because nobody's ever done a game with spiderfrogs in it

[Student of Trinity]

Spiderfrog, spiderfrog.

Might find one in a wider bog.

Spins no web, just hops real high

And shoots its tongue to catch a fly.

Hey there, there goes a spiderfrog.

[waterplant]

SoT, If you're not writing theme songs for left-field cartoons as a profession then you are totally wasting your life

[Lilith]

he's a physics professor which is not nearly as cool

[Men are from Slars]

There once was a physics professor from...

 

no, see, it already breaks the meter. not nearly as cool

[Student of Trinity]

Hey, maybe I could do both. Like a costumed superhero with a secret identity, only not quite as beneficial to society. But we can't all be Clark Kent. Would I get to wear a cape? Or would that be a faux pas, coolness-wise? I'm a little unclear on that.

[Men are from Slars]

De-de-de-de-de Inspector Trinity

De-de-de-de-de-de-de hoo-hoo

[Student of Trinity]

If all it takes is 'de-de-de', I'm pretty sure the cape would be over the top.

[Men are from Slars]

Dedede has a robe. Not quite a cape but definitely more X than a cape, where X is pretty much anything

[Student of Trinity]

I'm.

Too geeky for this cape.

[Zummi]

I though scuba suits were enough for a superhero outfit?

[waterplant]

I'm not sure that capes and scuba suits are all that necessary for writing theme songs for kids cartoons. If you got your dual lives mixed up you might accidentally wear this outfit to a lecture. Imagine trying to explain your way out of that one Dr Jones/SoT!

[Dantius]

Originally Posted By: CRISIS on INFINITE SLARTIES

De-de-de-de-de Inspector Trinity
De-de-de-de-de-de-de hoo-hoo

I begin to grow extremely suspicious that Slarty is simply a cunningly programmed spambot designed to promote Lady Gaga songs...

[The Ratt]

I think he was referencing the Inspector Gadget theme song there, not Lady Gaga.

[Dintiradan]

Is this where I make a post stating that Dantius is uncultured swine because we don't happen to share the same childhood memories?

 

(Inspector Gadget was great, in any case. Utterly formulaic, in hindsight, but still great.)

 

I pose the following to Messrs. Slartucker and Student of Trinity: what if the potential superhero were to wear both a robe and a cape?

[RCCCL]

Is one of his super powers the ability to not have all this extraneous clothing tangle or hither him in anyway?

[Sudanna]

Silly, all superheroes have that power. Except Dollar Man.

[Student of Trinity]

Wait a mo', here. It started out, I was going to write theme songs for weird cartoons, instead of being a superhero. Now somehow, over a few posts, it has garble-morphed into actually having superpowers. So now I'm a superhero, and my origin story is that I was bitten by a radioactive misunderstanding.

[Randomizer]

Originally Posted By: RCCCL

Is one of his super powers the ability to not have all this extraneous clothing tangle or hither him in anyway?

This is why in the Marvel comics when Captain America became Nomad he ditched the cape after tripping on it.

Originally Posted By: Student of Trinity

So now I'm a superhero, and my origin story is that I was bitten by a radioactive misunderstanding.

Would you rather be the super villain and be injured in a lab accident?

As Sheldon Cooper pointed out in The Big Bang Theory most major super villains have doctorates. Villainy could be reduced if the institutions had a better screening process.

[Student of Trinity]

Well, it's really a sort of unfortunate quirk of academic history. The technical requirements for a doctoral degree, as they were formalized in the 19th century, are to make an original contribution to knowledge, or to construct a doomsday weapon that can plausibly threaten all life on earth. Sounds funny today, I know, but those were militaristic, nationalistic times, and academic traditions die hard.

 

Most people go the 'original contribution' route, just because it's so much easier — the contribution doesn't have to be at all big. But occasionally some twisted genius comes before the committee with a death ray, and they have to pass him through.

[Dantius]

Originally Posted By: Randomizer

As Sheldon Cooper pointed out in The Big Bang Theory most major super villains have doctorates. Villainy could be reduced if the institutions had a better screening process.

Hey, I didn't go to evil engineering school so I could be called "Mr. Dantius!"

Originally Posted By: Student of Trinity

Wait a mo', here. It started out, I was going to write theme songs for weird cartoons, instead of being a superhero. Now somehow, over a few posts, it has garble-morphed into actually having superpowers. So now I'm a superhero, and my origin story is that I was bitten by a radioactive misunderstanding.

Your origin story is that you were bitten by a radioactive Richard Feynman. Take it and run with it.

[Dikiyoba]

Wait. You're telling me that physics isn't a superpower? You mean you don't run around in a lab coat thwarting bank robbers and rescuing people from burning buildings?

 

You have retroactively ruined Dikiyoba's childhood.