Actaeon

Actaeon wakes with a start. He finds himself surrounded by frightened, dusty Spiderwebbers. In the distance, he sees a plume of smoke rising from the new boards.

Actaeon: "What the?"

He finally notices the blue speck.

Actaeon: "Oh no..."

As the last fleeing Spiderwebber boards the bus, the scene shifts. Outside, dense forest obscures all but a little patch of blue sky.

Actaeon: "I forgot to turn off the engine..."

Excalibur: "So, did we travel in time, or just...?"

Actaeon: "Only one way to find out, I guess."

Dikiyoba: "Do you suppose there's a grocery store nearby?"

Actaeon is asleep in the seat behind the driver, dreaming peacefully of days gone by.

Pretty sure that was Arizona. New Mexico is the liberal bastion of the SouthWest.

That would only take, like, two new accounts. Really, Trenton, keep up.

Yes, yes, you're an oldbie. However, I ran the math, and your rate is still higher than mine. Not higher than Alorael or Randomizer, but...

Am... Am I confused or are there two Tyran's?

You are confused. There are far more than two Tyrans, although none (that I know of) contain an apostrophe.

That would work even better if the Imban joke was about Master1, instead.

Given how much I resent standardizes testing for its role in education, I'm pretty sure I don't want it anywhere near the presidency. In any case, I am much more concerned about the behavior of the Legislative branch than the Executive, lately.

Edit: Just looked up the Citizens United case. It didn't mean NEARLY what I'd been lead to believe.

Come now, Aran. If Alorael is a member of a class of things which are all Imban, it does not necessarily follow that all things that are Imban are also Alorael. Your fancy notation does not change the transitive property of equality's applicability, or lack thereof.

3,414 posts hardly qualifies as rarely, VCH. Or, if it does, there are only twenty members who are otherwise.

Some poor slob is breaking his back in a server farm to keep this pathetic thread alive. Shame on you.

It was worth it to see your return. To mark the occasion, I'll start a thread where we all share our real names, addresses, and SSNs.

You were always just a number; you simply didn't know it until now.

Does everyone have a new member number, or only some people? And if everyone has a new one, did they all change in the same way (going down, I guess?)?

It's possible that some of the very low numbers remained the some. Otherwise, most everyone has had a significant change, going down.

To clarify, I'm not asking for a free for all to talk about your own PDNs. We've had plenty of those. The member number discussion was derailing Jewels' thread, so I'm trying to give it a new home.

Want to respond to an aspect of the forum that isn't really covered in any thread? Like someone sig, dislike their avatar, or want to show off your new member number? Here's the place to do that.

If this is going to continue, perhaps we should make a separate member number topic?

Edit: Kindly direct your further comments here.

One question I forgot to ask is whether we should go back to the old method of choosing the VP. I can't help but giggle internally at the idea of Obama and Romney sharing the White House.

Actaeon deliberately scribbles "peanut butter", "jelly", and "bread" onto the list. He glares around as if to defend the dullness of his selection.

He then dons his long coat, exits Spidweb, and sits in the seat behind the driver, giving Diki a conspiratorial wink on his way past.

I move that we introduce a measure which restricts all non-spiderweb memes, gimmicks, inside jokes, and references (including, but not limited to, punning, rhyming, alliteration, yo momma jokes, Dr Who, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Wheel of Time, and ponies) to specified threads. Exceptions will be made for direct applicability to the subject at hand. Avatars, profiles, and custom titles are also exempt. Memes considered spiderweb-associated (and thus permissible in any context) include, but are not limited to: Fluffy Turtles, Alex's Cartoons, Dikiyoba's stories, Slarty vs Desk, Imban, GIFTs, Skribbane, Sniping Pedestrians, electing Alcritas.

Edit: Reprimand retracted due to corresponding behavioral retraction.

Actaeon looks up at Sylae's arrival.

Actaeon: "No, I haven't. Actually, there are a lot of people unaccounted for. I'd take a count, but I don't remember who all was on the bus in the first place. What do you need her for, anyway?

Sylae: "I need an admin to let me into CalRef."

Actaeon: "Get Iffy to do it."

Sylae: "I can't find him, either."

Actaeon: "Hmph. Well, I doubt their absence has anything to do with the weird transformations, but it might be worth looking into. Let me know if I can help in any way.

If anyone meant it literally, I suspect I would already be tied up in the trunk of Nalyd's car.

(OOC: Come on now, people. All Along the Watchtower was Dylan, originally.)

Alorael opens the gate for the procession, and they make their way to the great hall, where they find a fire already roaring. The kettle is beginning to hiss, and Randomizer is busy mixing some concoction with cocoa and coffee.

Actaeon: "Thanks for this."

Randomizer: "Don't mention it. It was this, or be the one to go wake *i. Someone's going to have to answer to the admins eventually."

Actaeon: "Slarty's in no condition for it, and I'm not even a mod. To tell you the truth, I'm not even sure what happened back there. I told the most plausible tale I could think of on the fly, but all is not well. I'm not surprised by Sylae, but Aran? SoT? And now Harehunter's doing this rhyming thing that almost makes me wish he'd go back to punning."

He glaces towards the cluster of mods near the doorway. Sylae, Nikki, and Tyran are all discussing something deeply. Triumph sits nearby, deep in thought. SoT is gazing at something in the distance.

Actaeon: "There's a mystery here, and something tells me that the only way to solve it is to get back on that bus."

Randomizer: "Did you ever think you might be projecting your own desire for adventure into a conspiracy that doesn't exist?"

Actaeon: "This is Spiderweb. There is always a conspiracy."

Actaeon turns.

Actaeon: "For goodness sake, Diki, what's wrong? Are you hurt?"

Realization dawns.

Actaeon: "Don't worry. I don't think you're going to turn into anything you don't want to be."

Nikki approaches Actaeon, who is dramatically surveying the forum in the distance.

Nikki: "What in Avernum happened?"

Actaeon: "The bus runs on community spirit. We almost ran dry. The space in between stops in time- it's full of that kind of cold that lulls you to a sleep you never wake from. It's a good thing the course was already set, 'cause none of us was conscious enough to steer it. It was sort of a crash landing there at the end. But they'll recover, I think. I hope."

Nikki eyes him doubtfully.

Actaeon: "Don't look at me like that. Just because you wear mod blue these days... Anyway, we better help everyone up to General. We'll talk further when we have a nice fire going and something hot to drink."

Nikki: "Tea, I trust."

Actaeon: "What else, govn'r?"

The pair begin herding the assemblage toward the gates.

That much I knew, but I fail to understand how he relates to the topic at hand.