Fledgling Fyora waitingforgo Posted October 28, 2014 Share Posted October 28, 2014 I finally finished a (first?) playthrough of Avadon: The Black Fortress, and I'm inspired to do something a bit humorous. The first list is a "spoiler alert" for that game. All I Really Need to Know, I Learned from Avadon Even in the middle of combat, bloodthirsty enemies don't mind taking a break so you can chat with the Wayfarer. The "Do you have a vendetta against the Pact?" checkbox is remarkably underutilized on Hand applications. The world's most fearsome dragons don't take up any more room than a spider. As a Hand of Avadon, your word is absolute law, and you will be feared and respected by upwards of 5% of the people you meet. If you're evil, the best strategy you have for survival is to remain a non-red friendly. Avadon can't touch you if you don't enter combat! No one has ever thought to ride an animal. It's possible to make an invisibility cloak out of lockpicks and secret-door buttons. If you haven't 100% resolved a mission assignment, don't offer any updates; nobody wants to be kept in the loop, ever. All arguments against Avadon boil down to "I'd rather put the interests of me and a dozen of my friends over the safety of the entire realm." The best way to prove you're not evil is to kill hundreds of people just doing their jobs while you look for evidence of your innocence. And this list is spoiler-y for Jeff Vogel's entire oeuvre... All I Really Need to Know, I Learned from a Spiderweb Software Game There is no art as lost or arcane as the ability to swim. Everyone you consider friendly is unbelievably powerful and has secretly betrayed you long ago. If you ever can't leave a conversation, it's about to get ugly. No matter how thinly stretched personnel resources are at the beginning of your career, there will still be hundreds of people who were more powerful than you waiting to attack you at the end of your adventure. Scientists believe 50% of all doors in the universe cannot be unlocked. Any wound can be healed from -- even death -- unless it occurs in a dialog box. It's common to be asked by someone to slaughter a hidden group of people or monsters, only to realize you'd already done so earlier when you stumbled across them. Everyone is taught the art of forging a world-spanning conspiracy starting from childhood. Portcullis wheels are more common than dogs. The worst-case scenario for any wizard experiment is "treasonous threat." The best-case scenario for any wizard experiment is "comical threat." Luca, ĐªгŦĦ Єяŋϊε and Xaiya 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Understated Ur-Drakon Earth Posted October 28, 2014 Share Posted October 28, 2014 horses are rare (only in (Exile/)Avernum 3 and remake when it comes out). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Randomizer Posted October 28, 2014 Share Posted October 28, 2014 It's not that every expects a Hand of Avadon to take a bribe, but how cheaply they can get away with it. No matter where you go everyone has already heard of you, and usually printed up wanted posters with your face requesting you dead. ĐªгŦĦ Єяŋϊε 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garrulous Glaahk Davies Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 It's possible to make an invisibility cloak out of lockpicks and secret-door buttons. ... okay, what? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fledgling Fyora waitingforgo Posted October 29, 2014 Author Share Posted October 29, 2014 ... okay, what? That's just a commentary on how tricky it is to see secret-door buttons and loose lockpicks... if only their near-invisibility power could be harnessed for good! Valdain the King 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garrulous Glaahk Learned Noremac Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 You are the only one in the entire universe to own a backpack. No one else ever has more than two or three things on their person at a time, including their clothes. All machinery is exactly the same. Being good at picking locks is essentially the same as, and arguably better than, having an engineering degree. Every person in the world is an incorrigible gossip. Any comment you make, up to and including those addressed to dying persons, WILL be shared immediately with all people the hearer knows, including their enemies. waitingforgo 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Understated Ur-Drakon Earth Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 enemies can have full armor and big swords but when they die they don't have anything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatchling Cockatrice Alorael at Large Posted November 2, 2014 Share Posted November 2, 2014 I can't offer much about the swords, but I imagine that after you get through killing someone the armor's likely to be in sorry shape. Besides, would you really want the armor that has demonstrably failed to protect someone? —Alorael, who will just go with the swords breaking themselves out of the shame of having let down their wielders. Swords are very sensitive about these things. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Understated Ur-Drakon Earth Posted November 2, 2014 Share Posted November 2, 2014 party fights against all kind of monsters etc and their armors are just fine. still those dead enemies armors would be worth of few coins. also if enemy switches from bow to melee then bows vanish. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyshakk Koan Valdain the King Posted November 14, 2014 Share Posted November 14, 2014 That's just a commentary on how tricky it is to see secret-door buttons and loose lockpicks... if only their near-invisibility power could be harnessed for good! A true assassin learns how to pick from birth. The second he picks up a lockpick the lock unlocks itself from seeing his pure power. If that doesnt work then I guess you could get by like in Skyrim. I can unlock any trap in Fallout 3 with a BigBoy or whatever it is called. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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