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Rest, Spiderweb

keira

By keira
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Alorael at Large
Hatchling Cockatrice

Alorael at Large

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Posted

 

 

I'm not set to be invisible, but I still seem not to show up for more than fifteen minutes. I only appear on the list when I post.

 

so what you're saying is you're always on the list

Not at all. I'm only on the list when my script to post and then delete my posts is working.

 

—Alorael, who has had some debugging issues. He'd ask Aran, but Aran has been having some bugginess issues. They might even be related.

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keira
Easygoing Eyebeast

keira

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A soft breeze works its way across my back as I stare out over the dimly-lit expanse of SW.

 

I stand upon the tile-roofed building referred to as General. Below, in the security of their quarters, the members of the forum sleep, warm and at peace. A coldness fills my heart as I realize I am the only member awake at this time of night. Far below me a shadow scurries across the dim circle of light cast by one of the sparse streetlamps. "And so it begins," I whisper to myself as I spread my wings and leap off of the building.

 

I maintain altitude, about fifty feet above the ground, barely moving my wings, keeping silent. The beasts below don't notice as I fly overhead, their small minds concentrating on finding targets without wings. I quickly soar the streets, eyes sharp, counting. One hundred. A full company of noobs, and I'm the only thing standing between them and the residents of General. "Well, this should be fun," I say as I land on one of the four towers surrounding the Blades of Exile forum.

 

I descend into the tower, hooves clacking against the stone tiles in the eerie silence. Must fills the air as I enter the forum proper. Few were around to notice the modifications that had been made to BoE, and fewer still to frequent the forum. I step around the bits of code lying about, some being half-written segments of WxWidgets port, unfinished scenarios, and a large board full of TeX documentation. I descend another staircase, this one leading me underneath the forum and into the basement. I sneeze softly as the dust from my hooves rises and assaults my nose. Not even the few regular Blades visitors venture down into the basement tunnels. I stop at a door, notable for the rough d20 carved into the wood, and push it open, stepping inside into my workplace.

 

The interior is warm and filled with the buzzing of computers and machinery. I step around a half-written chunk of documentation and walk over to the nightly build system, examining the installer package left on the conveyer belt, still warm. "Revision 169," I snort. "Just like it's been for the last three months." I grab the package with my teeth and deposit it in the dumbwaiter, hitting a floor switch to lift it up to the forum proper. "Now, where did I put that bait?" I begin scrounging about the workplace.

 

"Aha! Here we are!" I say victoriously several minutes later as I discover a box labeled BAIT underneath a utility scenario. Brushing the scenario off--ignoring the sound of its graphics shattering on the stone floor--I open the box of bait. "Ugh, how can they stand this?" I ask myself as the smell of minmaxing and hints threads hit my nose. I hurriedly toss some of the topic into a saddlebag and toss it on my back, hurrying out of the room before the smell of bait permeates everything.

 

Outside the forum, I breathe easily again as I leap back into the sky, on the lookout for any new noobs. The cool breeze sends shivers down my back as I soar across the dark expanse of SW, the only illumination being the moon and an occasional flickering streetlamp. As I fly over a noob, it raises its head, pointed nose sniffing out the smell of the pungent bait on my back. An eerie howl sounds from behind me, the beast calling out to the rest of its foul kind. "Well, aren't you just nice," I growl, throwing stealth to the wayside for speed, darting up and ahead, far up into the sky, until the noob is nothing but a dot far below.

 

More howls fill the forum, rising above each other in a chilling symphony of death. "I hope the turtles don't mind fast food," I quip as I dive down, leveling off just above the rooftops of the forum. Below me, noobs appear, giving chase as on all fours. "Come and get it, you sons of bitches!" I yell as I fly over a large pit dominating the center of the forum, the hissing of countless fluffy turtles below. I stop above the center of the pit and shrug off the saddlebag. It opens as it falls, pungent post spreading about all over and drifting into the turtle den. The noobs stop at the edge of the pit, looking at each other in a rare moment of cooperation and teamwork.

 

"omg how i find out past mortax lair?" one hisses as it looks over the edge of the pit.

 

"1337 haX04!" another screams at it in their guttural tongue, "stfu noob pwnage!"

 

Suddenly, whether random or thorugh some miraculous work of coordination, all of the noobs collectively leap at me, strong legs carrying them far into the air. I swear and dart upward, a cloud of claws converging below me, barely missing my tail as I dart out of the way. "Better luck next time!" I yell as the noobs collide into each other, a maelstrom of claws falling down into the turtle den. The shriek of the turtles at their sudden meal sounds across the forum, and I quickly fly away, trying to unhear the slurping sounds of the noobs' little remaining sanity departing them.

 

I fly to the nearest forum and land, shuddering slightly as the sound of the noobs dies away, leaving only the silence of the night. I fold my wings and lean against a chimney, looking out again at the expanse of forum.

 

My ears perk up as I hear the faint tinkling of footsteps across the roof tiles. "Don't worry, the noobs are handled." I say, still looking at the moonlight board.

 

"Not all noobs, lol," a harsh voice says. I turn around just in time to see a fist strike me in the face, throwing me off of the roof of the board. I hit the ground below hard, hearing several ribs crack. A second later, a noob lands several feet away, cobblestones cracking under its powerful legs. Faintly, I think about how pissed the mods are going to be when they see that damage. The noob rises, walking over to me as I struggle to rise. "Ponies r ghey fagot," it says in its guttural language, swiping at me. I scream as it's claws slash across me, blood staining the green feathers of my wings. I kick a hoof at it, causing the creature to step back enough for me to get up. I struggle to ignore the pain and stand steady, noob venom coursing through my body. I know that if I don't get a potion soon, I will join the ranks of the noob.

 

The thought of that happening galvanizes my will, and I feel previously unknown strength and resolve filling me. I step back as the noob leaps forward, its claws perforating the space my head had been occupying a moment earlier. "Narg69 smart," it hisses in English, its accent nearly impossible to understand, "Narg69 not fall in hole like others. Narg69 know what hole is." It leaps forward again, swiping, and I duck, wincing as it takes off the tip of one of my ears. I swing around and throw a kick at it, smirking as I hear its carapace crack.

 

"Maybe Narg69 should get the hell out of where Narg69 doesn't belong," I growl at it as it steps back, holding its chest carapace. I leap forward again, throwing punches at the wounded area. I only land two before it backhands me into a wall. The abrupt entrance into Avernum 6 is, needless to say, painful.

 

"Narg69 not doesn't belong," it says, stepping through the me-shaped hole in the wall, "Narg69 know the spiderweb. Narg69 smart." I kick at it again as it nears, cracking one of it's legs.

 

"And how would Narg69 happen to be familiar with Spiderweb?" I ask, my magenta eyes darting about for anything to use as a weapon. Nothing but bricks, dust, and item guides. This was going to be tough.

 

"Because Narg69..." it pauses, almost thinking. For a minute it seems like its eyes glimmer with a hint of intelligence, "Narg69 was once member."

 

I laugh harshly, "Sorry, but we don't allow monsters into our forums. You must have us confused. Here, let me point you in the right direction." I say, jumping forward and tacking the beast to the ground, slamming my hooves into it's carapace. It screeches as its carapace crushes, fluids squirting out, flinging me away. For the third time that night my body slams into a hard obstacle, more bones cracking. I fall to the floor, unable to get up. a distance away, the noob stands, internal fluids dripping from it. It steps forward, gazing down at me, lifting a clawed hand and pinning my shoulder to the ground. I scream helplessly as I squirm about, struggling to get loose, looking up at the monster, saliva dripping from it's fangs. "Luna forgive me," I whisper as it reaches in for the kill.

 

It stops abruptly, just inches away from ending me. I look up to see it staring at me, my pitiful appearance reflecting at me in its eyes...eyes that appear conflicted. That flicker of intelligence is back, I realize, the flicker that I had dismissed earlier. Suddenly, it pulls its claws back, releasing me, and rises, staring down at me. "Narg69 think you worthy foe. Narg69 let you live for now." I shiver uncontrollably at its words as it steps back, limping out the hole in the forum wall and into the night.

 

"It's gone," I whisper to myself, struggling to get up. "Have to...get...to General..." I growl as I feel the venom coursing through me, my many injuries protesting as I struggle to the hole in the wall, pulling myself through. The moon is setting as I limp along the road, leaving a trail of blood behind me as I near the General board, its lights just turning on as I approach, the early-morning member likely up and seeing what had occurred since they had fallen asleep. I struggle to climb the wide marble stairs, tripping three times and falling to them. Finally, I make it to the wooden doors and push one open, stepping through unsteadily into the wood-paneled entry room of the board. A passing member sees me enter and yells something, I'm not sure what, but the sound causes me to collapse and fall to the floor, blood and noob venom leaking out of my myriad wounds.

 

The member runs over as I fall down, "Don't worry Sylae, they're coming!" he yells at me, looking around. I look up at him, unable to recognize who he is, only able to discern that he is human.

 

The venom pulses in me, making me feel even fainter. As my eyesight begins to dim, I struggle to say, whisper, anything to tell them about the poison. Finally, as my vision fades to black, I hiss, "Rest...Spiderweb...as always I...will guard the night."

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nikki.
Magnificent Ornk

nikki.

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Also, fun new avatar / PDN, Nikki. Is this the first of a new series? How many different puns can you make off the same bunch of other forum users' PDNs? LOL.

 

Second. Seems nobody knows Batman.

 

And I'll make as many puns as I can find obsessions.

 

(Edit: Cool story, Sy-bro)

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Triumph
Easygoing Eyebeast

Triumph

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@ Nikki: I guess I didn't see the one before Har-I mean Slartey Quinn. I haven't been on here as much lately.

 

I'm not deeply knowledgeable about Batman, but I try to maintain a vast and shallow pool of pop culture trivia knowledge so that I can grasp references just such as this. smile

 

Edit: Calling Sylae "Sy-bro" sounds too much like "cyborg" and makes me imagine a Borg Pony coming to assimilate the forum. icon_assimilated.gif

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